God Prepares Me

Tomorrow I begin my new job working with Keanne, a tiny little girl with many needs.

I already know Keanne a little bit. I have worked with her and interacted with her through my subbing. Last time I saw her I got hugs and smiles as if she recognized me from the time before! Little did I know back then that I would be her main caregiver in such a near future - did she? I believe God gives some of these learning disabled children a special knowledge - did she recognize me in that way?

God prepares us for our futures in various ways. Looking back can help us see just how much he does that. I can see how God put me in subbing positions that got me this job. I am looking forward to seeing how God will continue to prepare and bless this pairing.

I am looking forward to the relationship that will come and the daily interaction and growth I will see. No more wondering each day whether or not I'll get a call. No more walking into a classroom not knowing the names of the kids. No more trying to be another person - most often one I've never met - and reading their minds trying to do things their way. I will miss all the variety of students I met and now have a relationship with, but I will NOT miss the lack of routine. I am looking very forward to it!

I want to thank God for all the ways He has prepared me for this new position. I will be making decent money AND providing health insurance for my family. From where I am right now, it doesn't seem like it has taken me that long to get the job I needed, but from the view from the past, before I got it, it seemed to have taken so very very long. Not knowing is such a difficult thing.

I wonder how often we miss God's preparations for our futures. How often do we miss the lessons He is trying to teach us? When the time we are in is difficult, do we look inside to ourselves or do we look to God for help? I know I tend to try to solve things on my own first. I wait until I'm in really deep or really upset to take it to God. Why do I do that? Why do I wait? Do I not believe that I am important enough for God to care about the little stuff?

How often do we even look back and learn? I have looked back tonight and seen God's hand and how it has been moving in my life these past few months, but how often do I really do that? Do I only look at the good God has created in my life or have I also been know to look back to see His reprimands and His work in bringing me out of trouble? We need to spend time contemplating our lives and learning how God moves within them!