Passing Lanes

This weekend I have a prayer retreat planned at the church. We are using the DVDs that I purchased last year at Come to the Fire for our speakers and using video worship. One member of WCG will be running a prayer room while another runs a prayer walk in another room. A couple of ladies are doing food/snacks and we have greeters and sound booth people.

I have advertised this thing all over town to every church I can mail. I have sent invitations to the Church of God congregations in Ottumwa and Moberly. I have invited all the ladies I work with.

I have 4 registrations.
FOUR!

OK - so maybe most of the ladies who attend will be from our church.

So, today while all are leaving, I stop one lady and visit/say goodbye and stuff. In the exchange I say, "Will I see you on Friday and Saturday?" The response was very noncommittal. I tried another couple of people, but nobody was seeming all that interested!

These are the same ladies who were complaining that WCG was just meeting and collecting money - never 'doing' anything. We had a spa day last month and now a prayer retreat this month, but they aren't showing up. At the spa day we had 15 people, but only 7 were from our church!

I'm DONE trying to please these ladies and get them involved. They aren't going to like anything I do. I'm following my hubby's advice and building passing lanes. I'm going to do things and get excited and work on building up my programs - but I can't drag these ladies with me or wait for them- I'm going to have to find new ones to travel on my journey with me! Sunday morning church goers are going to miss out on a lot of fun in the journey to grow with Christ if they continue to resolve to only come on Sunday mornings! Following Christ and being a part of the body of believers takes more than just a couple of hours out of the weekend. There are plenty of ladies in our church who want to travel with Christ - we'll just have to go on without the others.

And it's not like they are all old! If they were all older, I could see that they are just from another generation, but some are quite young! Sometimes I feel like they serve God from a different tradition that the one I belong to. It's like there is a checklist of do's and don't's that are to be followed and if you get them all done when they are supposed to be done, then you'll get to be a Christian and go to heaven. The holiness movement I am a proud part of is all about relationship - with God and with others. Following where the Holy Spirit leads on a daily basis. In my Bible it says the Jesus came to fulfill the whole law and take my sin to the grave with Him. I am free from the condemnation of the Law of the Old Testament and am free to follow Christ with no limits. I am to be in such a close relationship with God that I can follow His leading daily and be Jesus all over my corner of the world - just wearing a "Jill Suit" while I'm doing it! OK - enough of that - that's my next blog!

I feel sorry for these ladies who choose to exclude themselves from the fellowship of women. I wish I could just rope them and bring them along for just ONE activity so that they could see for themselves what others are experiencing, but I'm not sure it will ever happen.

So on with the building of the passing lanes.

Obedience

Today's devotional assignment begins with 'Write out a declaration of intention to obey God at all costs. Pray and ask God to help you grow in obedience.' A declaration. A strong statement. But not only that, but at all costs. Am I truly willing to obey God at all costs? I know I am willing to obey Him at many costs, maybe even more than some of my friends, but at ALL costs? What about this new job of mine? It has taken me quite a while to get this job. I want it very much. I am helping to provide health insurance for my family.

Am I willing to put it on the line for God?

OK - put in that light, yes I am. But am I truly ready to go through with the actions that would cause me to lose it? Maybe not. I want to be. I truly want to be, but what would it take to be truly ready for that? And how would I really know it was what I am supposed to do? How would I know so completely that I would override my obedience to the job description for God?

I would have to be completely sure that it was from God, for one thing. Time with Him is important for that. As I spend time with God, I learn His voice and how to hear Him speak to me. It's just like any other friendship - the more time you spend together the more you recognize about the person. Learning His Word is critical, too. Testing everything that I sense may be from God against what He has said in His Word is important. God never changes, so His Word will never change. He will never ask me to do something that goes against His Word.

I think I can do that. I think I am ready to make that declaration.

God, I declare today that I will spend time with You every day, study Your Word, and spend time in prayer. I will learn to hear You and obey you at all costs.

You are my God.

Trusting God - REALLY Trusting Him

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you;

He shall never permit the righteous to be moved." Psalm 55:22 (NKJ)

The following is a collection of excerpts from my devotion for today. This writer said what is on my heart so much more eloquently than I am able to do.

"Through experience I have come to realize that trials and challenges are inevitable. I must learn to expect them, submit to them and learn from them. All the while, realizing that behind each challenge I find a God who longs to pour out His love on me and to carry my burdens if I let Him.

One thing I am learning is that when we ask our Heavenly Father for something, the journey He takes us on while we wait on Him is often times greater than the answered prayer itself. I hope you will let Him carry your burdens today and trust that He knows what is best for you and those you love.

Do I really expect God to carry my burdens or am I more comfortable carrying them myself?

When I saw this question I remembered what we discussed in small group time this week - we often take things to the alter and lay them down for God. We pray. We seek forgiveness. We find peace with God for that situation. Then we proceed to stand up, pick our burdens back up from the alter and walk away with them in tow.

Why do we do this? What is it about our burdens that make them more comfortable to carry ourselves? I know for myself that as an adult we have a lot of responsibilities and we cannot cast them on others. Perhaps we hold onto so many other responsibilities in other areas that we cannot fathom someone else taking that burden for us.

And... it is one thing to say you believe in God. It is quite another to actually trust Him to act in our world. We often put God's role as sitting up in the clouds looking down, holding his 'thunderbolts of power' to send down whenever there is something He wants or needs to change, or to answer prayer. We don't often think of God as sitting next to us helping us do whatever task is at hand.

God is there with you all the time. He is sitting next to you when you drive. He is the reason you turned that way the other day and avoided trouble up ahead. He is the reason for the fog you were driving slowly through and angry about for slowing you down. This is the same fog that kept you out of the path of the tornado coming in your path. He is the reason you remembered to bring that item with you at the last minute. He reminded you of it before it was too late.

The problem is remembering to listen to Him. We need to spend time learning to recognize His voice so it speaks out over all other noise going on around us. That is acquired during our quiet times with God.

When challenges come my way, who do I run to for help and advice?

I know that I too often think of people who can help me before I take it to God. I often have to remind myself that if I had just taken it to God in the first place, I would feel so much better so much sooner!!!

In what areas of my life do I trust God the least?

Wow. Tough question. I would probably have to say that I trust God the least at work. Not that I have a lack of faith, but I am often going so fast that I do not slow down to think and pray. At home and at church I recognize God's hand and ask for His action. At work I don't think that way. I will have to work on that one. I really need God's help in this assignment I have right now. I love these kids, but they are very trying and take all my energy away. I would like to have some left for my family at the end of the day!

Dear God, You are all powerful, all-knowing, and present in all places at the same time. Your power and strength have no match. You are capable of more things than I would ever begin to fathom. Please help to learn to trust You with my life - every aspect of my life. From my waking hours to my betime, please walk by my side and let me know you are there. Please walk ahead of me and prepare my path and walk behind me to pick up the pieces. I want to remember to come to you when I am unsure of my next words - put those words in my mouth for me. Please consume my body and fill me completely so that when I walk out of the front door today to work I will be Jesus walking around Kirksville, Missouri wearing a costume that looks like Jill. I know that on my own I will fail miserably. Consume me, Lord. Take over. I don't want to drive anymore. I want you to be in complete charge.

AMEN

Psalm 68:19, "Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens." (NIV)

Proverbs 3:5, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." (NIV)

Deuteronomy 31:8, "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." (NIV)

Floods and Trickles

John 6:19 says Everyone was trying to touch him - so much energy surging from him, so many people healed! MSG
This is how ministry feels! Everyone wants to be right by the pastor - close quarters - intimate. I remember how I felt when Jeff wasn't the senior pastor. I wanted to be noticed as someone special by the person who, really and truly, represented Christ in the church I attended.

We represent Christ. All Christians represent Christ, but those in the pastoral ministry are put in a position to be that earthly figure that people look at when they are looking for Christ.

What a responsibility!

Jesus was putting out energy all over the place as the crowds pressed in on him and he healed them!

How do we handle the stress of all those around us pressing in on us? We know that all the things we do make a difference - that's not the point. I know that Jeff and I love to know how God has worked through some small thing we have said or done. That's what we are passionate about. That's what keeps us going. But there are so many things that we could be doing and saying. There are so many things we WANT to do and say! How do we handle that stress and keep going?

Prayer is the answer. We need to stay pray-up.

But do we do it? I know I have not been the best at it. I know in my head and I teach in my classes that Jesus must come first (JOY - Jesus first, Others second, myself last)
I have translated that as: work for Jesus first, help others second, find quiet time for myself last. And last it usually is. Even now, as I spend some quality quiet time with God and the Bible I find that it is time for bed. I have to teach tomorrow and need all the physical rest I can get! So how do I find time for all of it like Jesus did?

I need to put time with God first. I need to get up and spend quiet time with God every morning before the rest of the house wakes up.

I will do that tomorrow. I will get up when I plan to.
I will pray before I go to work.
My day has to be better! It can't get much worse!
And I will pray throughout the day.
Jesus did it.
He was human.
I can do it with God's help!!!!!

Light and Dark

Are you familiar with Louie Giglio? He does some wonderful work. He has worked with Matt Redman and Chris Tomlin on projects - even went on tour with them and shared verbally...moving people's hearts with his words the way Redman and Tomlin move people's hearts in their music.

I found some online videos of his speaking last night and listened to one. It was about the difference in how we view the world verses how God views the world.

Think about the creations of God as a 'universe-large' canvas of art. All of the things God does come out on that canvas that is larger than our imaginations.

Then there is us. We go about our days and see the world - only we can only see a 4x6 picture postcard of God's canvas. Our view of God's canvas is limited to our little postcard - making us wonder, sometimes daily, about what in the world God is doing - unable to understand even a little.

Have you ever seen those large pictures that are made up of little pictures? You know - the ones I think of most are the ones that make a flag or another patriotic scene. They are composed completely of smaller pictures of people or places or things.

What if we were each a picture in one of those creations? To make the overall effect work, some of us would have to have pretty dark backgrounds. Some would have very light ones. Some would be somewhere in the middle. But altogether, the scene would be indescribably moving.

What if the dark time in your life is necessary to the overall picture?
I remember some dark times in my life.
At one point in my life I was raped.
At one point in my life my fiancee dumped me for the girl who lived downstairs at seminary.
At one point in my life I thought I had just lost my baby.
At one point in my life I thought my husband was having an affair.
At one point in my life I thought about leaving my husband.
At one point in my life there wasn't enough money for a significant period of time and we wondered how we would get through.
At several points in my life I have had to pack up everything and move far away from a place where I was comfortable, secure, and well-loved.
At several points in my life I have lost loved ones to death.

Are we able to see how those dark times might be times that God will use for His glory, for His canvas? I have been able to use many of these from my own life to connect, share, and counsel with ladies from the churches I have served. And that doesn't mean that God only uses them if you're a pastor's wife. There is connecting, sharing, and counseling going on between women all over the globe and most of them aren't pastor's wives!

Isn't it a wonderful feeling when you can honestly say "I understand - I've been there too" when someone needs to talk? Well, you wouldn't have been there if it hadn't been for the dark time you had been through!

There are lighter times, too!
At one point in my life I walked down the aisle to the man of my dreams.
At 3 points in my life I looked down into the face of my newborn child.
Daily I look at my kids and my husband and thank God for the blessings He showers on me through them.
At several points in my life I have been able to share deeply with friends I love about things about which they care deeply.
Every day we all can look around us and count the ways our lives are light - even when it's a dark time.

I have loved ones and friends going through some really dark times right now.
I have loved ones and friends going through some really light times right now.
Together we join the world to create the tapestry that God calls Earth.
We should rejoice with those in the light times and give a hand to those in the dark times.
Look around you - how can you help someone in a dark time or rejoice with someone in a light time?
The choice is yours.