God Prepares Me

Tomorrow I begin my new job working with Keanne, a tiny little girl with many needs.

I already know Keanne a little bit. I have worked with her and interacted with her through my subbing. Last time I saw her I got hugs and smiles as if she recognized me from the time before! Little did I know back then that I would be her main caregiver in such a near future - did she? I believe God gives some of these learning disabled children a special knowledge - did she recognize me in that way?

God prepares us for our futures in various ways. Looking back can help us see just how much he does that. I can see how God put me in subbing positions that got me this job. I am looking forward to seeing how God will continue to prepare and bless this pairing.

I am looking forward to the relationship that will come and the daily interaction and growth I will see. No more wondering each day whether or not I'll get a call. No more walking into a classroom not knowing the names of the kids. No more trying to be another person - most often one I've never met - and reading their minds trying to do things their way. I will miss all the variety of students I met and now have a relationship with, but I will NOT miss the lack of routine. I am looking very forward to it!

I want to thank God for all the ways He has prepared me for this new position. I will be making decent money AND providing health insurance for my family. From where I am right now, it doesn't seem like it has taken me that long to get the job I needed, but from the view from the past, before I got it, it seemed to have taken so very very long. Not knowing is such a difficult thing.

I wonder how often we miss God's preparations for our futures. How often do we miss the lessons He is trying to teach us? When the time we are in is difficult, do we look inside to ourselves or do we look to God for help? I know I tend to try to solve things on my own first. I wait until I'm in really deep or really upset to take it to God. Why do I do that? Why do I wait? Do I not believe that I am important enough for God to care about the little stuff?

How often do we even look back and learn? I have looked back tonight and seen God's hand and how it has been moving in my life these past few months, but how often do I really do that? Do I only look at the good God has created in my life or have I also been know to look back to see His reprimands and His work in bringing me out of trouble? We need to spend time contemplating our lives and learning how God moves within them!

Powerful

It's just amazing how a picture can paint a thousand words, isn't it?

I've Been Tagged!

Here's how you play: once you have been tagged, you have to
write a blog with 16 weird, random things, facts, habits or goals about
yourself. At the end, choose 9 people to be tagged, listing their
names. Don't forget to leave them a comment ("You're It") and to read
your blog. You can't tag the person who tagged you. Since you can't tag
me back, let me know when you've posted your blog so I can see your
answers.

Here goes:

1. I had a childhood imaginary friend named "Fasten Seatbelt Grand Torino." Any guesses as to the make of our car when I was little? LOL

2. I was called to be a pastor's wife at the same time Jeff was called to be a pastor - we both ran as fast as we could!

3. I am afraid of balloons.

4. I have to have the covers straight and 'just right' to sleep - and tucked-in! No untucked sheets!!!!

5. My freshman year of college I drank a twelve-pack of pop every day.

6. I eat my cereal with plain yogurt instead of milk.

7. I am afraid to be alone at night. (Having three kids makes this a non-issue...)

8. I believe angels and demons live beside us on earth but in a realm we cannot always see and are battling around us at all times for control of any given area. I believe these angels are given their strength from our prayers.

9. I can wiggle my ears...

10. I want to learn to scuba dive and someday go to the Great Barrier Reef.

11. My grandfather was on the team that invented flavored soy substitute food - bacon bits, soy burgers, etc...

12. I would rather lose than be involved in a conflict - even verbal - and will often get a stomach ache when the situation gets tense.

13. I've driven a car at over 130mph three times over the course of many years and in very different situations.

14. I was acting so goofy at a Bryan Adams concert when I was 14 that he looked out and laughed at me! (We were in the 6th row on the floor...) LOL

15. I love raisins and nuts, but not in my food.

16. My best friend in junior high tickled my until I peed my pants and I haven't been ticklish since!!!

I am going to tag - Debbie, Eric, Heath, Tina, Ginger, Emily D., Emily H., Jenny Beth, and Nathan!

Heaven

Luke 13 says:

18. A bystander said, "Master, will only a few be saved?"
19. "Whether few or many is none of your business. Put your mind on your life with God. The way to life - to God! - is vigorous and requires your total attention. A lot of you are going to assume that you'll sit down to God's salvation banquet just because you've been hanging around the neighborhood all your lives.
20. Well, one day you're going to be banging on the door, wanting to get in, but you'll find the door locked and the Master saying, 'Sorry, you're not on my guest list.'
21. "You'll protest, 'But we've known you all our lives!'
22. only to be interrupted with his abrupt, 'Your kind of knowing can hardly be called knowing. You don't know the first thing about me.'
23. "That's when you'll find yourselves out in the cold, strangers to grace. You'll watch Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and all the prophets march into God's kingdom.
24. You'll watch outsiders stream in from east, west, north, and south and sit down at the table of God's kingdom. And all the time you'll be outside looking in - and wondering what happened.

I have seen this same kind of thing in the churches I've attended over the years - people who believe that their presence in the church building, or their friends from the church, or the things they have done or the money they have given to the church will get them into heaven.

But God thinks about a ticket to heaven in a way that is contrary to our human nature - He says we do not earn it by what we do. God ask us to become His children - that's it! He wants to have a relationship with you. That's what will get you into heaven, not your money or your friends or even your church attendance! Those things are good, but it's like a good paint job on a house - if the foundation isn't in place, the whole things will fall in around you!

How is your relationship with God today? Are you a child of God? Before you answer, think about it for a minute: what is it about children that makes them different in our lives?

• Our children are watching us very closely.

Are you watching God? Are you looking at what He is doing around you, how He his hand is moving? Are you reading the Bible and studying what He has done to bring us to the place we are today?

• Our children are imitating what they see.

Are you imitating God? Are you imitating Jesus? Have you filled yourself with the Holy Spirit and allowed Him to guide you - every part of you? Are you allowing Him to change you even today? Sometimes we allow God in to clean up what we've messed up in the past, but we shut the door and go on without seeing that the changing and cleaning process is a never-ending deal - we need to be continually looking at ourselves through the eyes of God so that we can learn and become more like Him every day.

• Our children work for our attention - sometimes very hard.

When was the last time you sat and waited for God's attention? Many of us sit down to pray, but when was the last time you wait for God's full attention first? Wow. It can sometimes be very hard to feel the presence of God, but if we are persistent, He will show up in powerful ways. Pray and wait for God. If you don't sense Him with you, keep going - keep at it. He says that He will answer. Sometimes we just have to keep knocking incessantly.

• Our children enjoy spending time with us - cuddling and enjoying our closeness.

Do you enjoy your time with God or do you look at it as a chore, or a stop of your list of things to do in a day? Do you rush through your time, always with an eye to the clock, ticking off the 'proper' amount of time to be spent, only to rush off as soon as the time is complete? Try spending more time with Him - just quietly in His presence. Don't 'do' anything but just sit and spend time in His presence. I like to write with Him. These journal entries are written as I feel Him with me. They are the thoughts I have. (And as much as it seems that I am writing to others, I am writing to myself what is being revealed to me) You can spend time with God throughout the day as you quietly go through your everyday existence.

I have a tendency to keep 'noise' on around me all the time, but I have found that as I spend time doing chores in the quiet, God it there with me and we can 'cuddle' quietly. I'm still folding laundry or doing the dishes, but I find these quiet time to just cuddle up and BE in His presence. I don't count this as devotional time or prayer time - just cuddle time. I like cuddle time. Some days I think it keeps me sane.....

• Our children look to us to provide what they need.

When was the last time we asked God for something we needed? It seems kind of petty to ask for new socks and underwear or new jeans or shoes when there are people dying of cancer next door or down the road, doesn't it? But God wants to help us with what we see as small things as well as the large things. It's kind of a reversal of the talents - if we can trust Him with the small things, we will be able to trust Him with the big things as well. Don't be afraid to go to God and ask for what is on your heart - no matter how small it may seem. He already knows, so go ahead and ask. As we learn to continually go to God for these things, when the bigger things come up, heading straight to God will be already ingrained into our hearts and we will approach with much for confidence and assurance that the need will be met. This faith will bring more answered prayers that we could ever imagine.

• Our children grow to become miniature versions of our selves.

How often I look at my children and see my husband and myself! Sometimes I enjoy seeing those wonderful qualities. Sometimes I cringe. Like our own children, the goal is to become like Christ in our lives - to model Him is all we do and say. Look to God, spend time in prayer, and read your Bible to get your model of how to live as Christ. Then set out to make those necessary changes and be Jesus - here, there, and everywhere!

Obedience

Today's devotional assignment begins with 'Write out a declaration of intention to obey God at all costs. Pray and ask God to help you grow in obedience.' A declaration. A strong statement. But not only that, but at all costs. Am I truly willing to obey God at all costs? I know I am willing to obey Him at many costs, maybe even more than some of my friends, but at ALL costs? What about this new job of mine? It has taken me quite a while to get this job. I want it very much. I am helping to provide health insurance for my family.

Am I willing to put it on the line for God?

OK - put in that light, yes I am. But am I truly ready to go through with the actions that would cause me to lose it? Maybe not. I want to be. I truly want to be, but what would it take to be truly ready for that? And how would I really know it was what I am supposed to do? How would I know so completely that I would override my obedience to the job description for God?

I would have to be completely sure that it was from God, for one thing. Time with Him is important for that. As I spend time with God, I learn His voice and how to hear Him speak to me. It's just like any other friendship - the more time you spend together the more you recognize about the person. Learning His Word is critical, too. Testing everything that I sense may be from God against what He has said in His Word is important. God never changes, so His Word will never change. He will never ask me to do something that goes against His Word.

I think I can do that. I think I am ready to make that declaration.

God, I declare today that I will spend time with You every day, study Your Word, and spend time in prayer. I will learn to hear You and obey you at all costs.

You are my God.

Trusting God - REALLY Trusting Him

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you;

He shall never permit the righteous to be moved." Psalm 55:22 (NKJ)

The following is a collection of excerpts from my devotion for today. This writer said what is on my heart so much more eloquently than I am able to do.

"Through experience I have come to realize that trials and challenges are inevitable. I must learn to expect them, submit to them and learn from them. All the while, realizing that behind each challenge I find a God who longs to pour out His love on me and to carry my burdens if I let Him.

One thing I am learning is that when we ask our Heavenly Father for something, the journey He takes us on while we wait on Him is often times greater than the answered prayer itself. I hope you will let Him carry your burdens today and trust that He knows what is best for you and those you love.

Do I really expect God to carry my burdens or am I more comfortable carrying them myself?

When I saw this question I remembered what we discussed in small group time this week - we often take things to the alter and lay them down for God. We pray. We seek forgiveness. We find peace with God for that situation. Then we proceed to stand up, pick our burdens back up from the alter and walk away with them in tow.

Why do we do this? What is it about our burdens that make them more comfortable to carry ourselves? I know for myself that as an adult we have a lot of responsibilities and we cannot cast them on others. Perhaps we hold onto so many other responsibilities in other areas that we cannot fathom someone else taking that burden for us.

And... it is one thing to say you believe in God. It is quite another to actually trust Him to act in our world. We often put God's role as sitting up in the clouds looking down, holding his 'thunderbolts of power' to send down whenever there is something He wants or needs to change, or to answer prayer. We don't often think of God as sitting next to us helping us do whatever task is at hand.

God is there with you all the time. He is sitting next to you when you drive. He is the reason you turned that way the other day and avoided trouble up ahead. He is the reason for the fog you were driving slowly through and angry about for slowing you down. This is the same fog that kept you out of the path of the tornado coming in your path. He is the reason you remembered to bring that item with you at the last minute. He reminded you of it before it was too late.

The problem is remembering to listen to Him. We need to spend time learning to recognize His voice so it speaks out over all other noise going on around us. That is acquired during our quiet times with God.

When challenges come my way, who do I run to for help and advice?

I know that I too often think of people who can help me before I take it to God. I often have to remind myself that if I had just taken it to God in the first place, I would feel so much better so much sooner!!!

In what areas of my life do I trust God the least?

Wow. Tough question. I would probably have to say that I trust God the least at work. Not that I have a lack of faith, but I am often going so fast that I do not slow down to think and pray. At home and at church I recognize God's hand and ask for His action. At work I don't think that way. I will have to work on that one. I really need God's help in this assignment I have right now. I love these kids, but they are very trying and take all my energy away. I would like to have some left for my family at the end of the day!

Dear God, You are all powerful, all-knowing, and present in all places at the same time. Your power and strength have no match. You are capable of more things than I would ever begin to fathom. Please help to learn to trust You with my life - every aspect of my life. From my waking hours to my betime, please walk by my side and let me know you are there. Please walk ahead of me and prepare my path and walk behind me to pick up the pieces. I want to remember to come to you when I am unsure of my next words - put those words in my mouth for me. Please consume my body and fill me completely so that when I walk out of the front door today to work I will be Jesus walking around Kirksville, Missouri wearing a costume that looks like Jill. I know that on my own I will fail miserably. Consume me, Lord. Take over. I don't want to drive anymore. I want you to be in complete charge.

AMEN

Psalm 68:19, "Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens." (NIV)

Proverbs 3:5, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." (NIV)

Deuteronomy 31:8, "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." (NIV)

The Handiwork of God

My devotion today had a challenge - or maybe a reminder is a better word: Write about God's obvious presence in your life. Acknowledge and be thankful for the good in your life today.

Look to the right - I see my kitchen and my husband in it.
Lord, I am thankful for the abundance of food you provide for us. We have never gone hungry. While there may not have been what we wanted and desired, there has always been nutritious and filling food in our cupboards. Thank you for that.
Lord, I am thankful for my husband, Jeff. He is a kind and loving man. He is not demanding on me and he helps me in all that I do. I thank you for leading me to such a great guy. I not only think of him as my husband and marriage partner, but also my best friend. Nice, funny, smart, strong, and sexy - all rolled into one!

Look to the left - I see the wall in my dining room.
Lord, I thank you for the color of my wall. Having a house that had NOT WHITE walls has been a dream of mine for a long time. Thank you for a church family who asked and provided my heart's desire. And Lord, I thank you for the decorations on my wall, given to me by my mother and sister-in-law as a birthday and housewarming. They fit in our house and put that final touch on it. Thanks for such thoughtful gifts!

Look up - I see the ceiling.
Lord, thank you for the roof over our heads. This house has been a dream-come-true. Even Samantha recognized your gift in this when she said, "God gave us an Extreme Home Makeover!" Thank you for this large house and all the room we want and desire.

Look down - I see the clothes I am wearing.
Lord, thank you for providing us with nice things to wear over the years. I have always had what I needed to put on my body - and often very nice things. Our children have always had enough clothes to wear, and also often very nice things. Thank you for your provision in this area and for all the people you have put in our paths to provide us with such nice things.

Looking all around me I see your hand moving in my life. I see how you have provided for us over the years and have given us an abundance.

I choose thankfulness over grumbling and I will see you, Lord.